Wine. It Does a Body Good.

Please don't sue me for stealing your slogan, Dairy Farmers of America!  Wine is much more fabulous than milk, though, isn't it? (and water. and every other beverage. right?)

Preach it!

My sister had a birthday in August, so it was time to DIY!  For those of you who like to say, "It takes too much time to DIY, I can just go shopping and buy something.", I officially challenge that statement.  All in, which included researching my sister's Pinterest boards for what to make, making the gift, and running it to the post office took a smidge over an hour (in bits and pieces, mind you).  Unless you live directly above a gift shop and your sister lives with you, I doubt you're clocking any less time in buying vs. DIY'ing a gift like this.  Plus, people LOVE homemade gifts.  Unless they don't.  Soooo, there's that, I guess.

Luckily for me, my sister appreciates what I DIY for her.  Either that, or she's just too nice to say otherwise.  I'm sure I've given her a few duds in my DIY days, but hopefully the good projects make up for it.

Today's project is an easy one!  Here's what you need:

Scrap of wood
Paint (the 99cent acrylic variety will do just fine)
Paintbrush
Paper/pattern/sketch (or freehand it, whatevs.)

Here's the plan:

Take your piece of wood that most certainly DID NOT come from the garage attic covered in bird poop, and make sure it's clean and free of rough edges.  (Here's the spot where my sister will pause, never knowing if the above sentence is the truth, or just my way of freaking her out.  She'll live in the dark forever- I'll never tell.)

It's clean, I promise!!
(I used the tacks to hold up the backside of the board for quicker drying time)

Next up, paint the wood with your background color.  I chose to use a mixture of white and graphite paint with a smidge of water- I wanted more of a weathered gray wood look- something slightly opaque, but still rustic looking. 

Let the paint soak in for a  minute, and then wipe it softly
with a rag to let some of the wood grain show through.

While your paint is drying, start making sketches of your wine bottle.  Don't worry if it isn't perfect- it shouldn't be- it's not a photograph!!  When you think you have the template you want, slap it on your DRY wood piece, and trace around it.

I sketched a smaller version of the bottle first,
and then enlarged around it to make the process a bit easier.

Here's where you need to make sure you've got the right paintbrush- no dollar store paint by numbers brush here.  Get yourself a small angled brush- that's what'll work best for painting straight lines with a smart edge.  Use your angled brush to trace the outline of your wine bottle, and then fill it in.  I used the full strength version of my graphite acrylic paint that I mixed up earlier.  You could always use chalkboard paint here, as I was going for a similar look, but I did not feel like busting out and mixing up my pint of chalkboard paint when I wasn't going to use it as a reusable chalkboard. 

Ignore the shadows, please- my basement craft room needs some additional lighting.

While that dries, practice your handwriting.  You need to give it a few goes- work the kinks out!!

Practice makes (almost) perfect!

When you feel that your handwriting is sufficiently less sucky than when you started practicing, use a paint marker on your wood board.

Almost done!

Drill a small hole in the back to use as a hangar of sorts, and voila, you're done!

Easy peazy.

Instant gift!!

Hope you liked it, Jess!!

Hammer Time.

Where has the summer gone??  I know I've been MIA for quite awhile- lots of weddings and visits to get in while the weather's nice!  Couple that with a crazy work schedule the past few weeks, and like sands through the hourglass, so are the nonexistent DIY sessions of my life.  (Days of Our Lives reference, anyone?) 

Annnnyway, here's a quick little DIY to do with little ones (because they can), or by yourself (because you can).  Either way, it'll turn out pretty!

Ooh la la...it's art!!

I found this little gem of a summer DIY somewhere online, and thought I'd give it a go.  Of course I had a hammer, watercolor paper, and blue painter's tape hanging around- staples of a DIY'er, really.

Supplies.  Yeah, it's upside down.  Live with it.
If you can't tell that it's a pad of watercolor paper, you're blind.

Here's what you do:

Pick some fancy flowers and leaves.  Try to pick ones that aren't super thick and watery- they might just burst when you try to hammer them.  Or, pick exactly that, if you want to create a messy explosion of plant juices.  Your choice.

SPLAT.

Yeah, that was kind of a mess.

Arrange your flowers artfully on your watercolor paper.  It's important to use watercolor paper and not just any old regular printer paper- the watercolor texture and absorbency is what you need for this project.

Or, arrange your one flower artfully.
These dang petals tend to stick in a clump!

Next, cover your flowers with painter's tape.  Make sure to cover the perimeter of the flower securely for best results.

Tape it down now!

Then, hammer away!  If you want to take a few quick hits and then pull the tape up a bit to check your progress, feel free!  The painter's tape comes up  easily, so you can see if additional hammering is necessary.

Looking good!

Use some fun stamps and a ribbon, and you've got a pretty little door hanger!
Too cute, right?

After you've done all this, mail the hammer and supplies to your sister for her 5 year old's birthday.  She'll really love you for it.  Promise.

Not yo' mama's Cross-Stitch

The first thing out of Dave's mouth when I started this project was, "Please don't show that to anyone."  Followed by, "Please tell me you're not hanging that in our house."  Then followed by, "As soon as you're done with that thing, I'm punching a hole in it." No sense of humor, this one.  The cause of this oh so serious marital strife?

Here ya go!

Oh yes I did.

(I jest on the marital strife.  If you know Dave, you know that the real message he was really trying to get across was, "Wife, I'm so proud of all of the DIY projects you do.  They really add to the beauty of our home, and they also keep you busy so I can enjoy a glass of whiskey in silence.  PS...you're beautiful."  True story.)

I can't really give you step by step DIY instructions on this piece, as I didn't create it, but I can give you the link on how to get it done yourself.  I came across this lovely little Etsy shop awhile ago, and wanted to make one of her pieces.  The shop is called GranniePanties, and the owner, Chrissy, creates templates/directions for various cross-stitch patterns.  My favorites include the 90's rap lyric patterns...they're cute enough to hang on your wall, but naughty enough to cause someone to do a double take when they read it.  Since most of her patterns only run around $5-6, they're super affordable to buy and make yourself.  Here's a link to the website:

GranniePanties on Etsy

And here's a breakdown of my costs to complete the project:

Pattern: $5
10" Embroidery Hoop: $1.79
Needles: Already had them, but they only run around $2 for a pack
Embroidery thread: .39 each (for 6 colors)
Cross-Stitch Fabric: $4.99 (but there's leftovers for another project!)

All in, if you need to buy everything, you're spending around $15 for hours of couch sitting fun.

Isn't your heart just going pitter-patter with excitement right now?
I know...you're too excited to even think straight.

Be warned, this isn't a quick project.  But, it's also pretty mindless.  All you have to do is be able to count squares, and loop thread through holes in an X.  Plop your butt in front of the TV while there's nothing on during a summer full of re-runs while it's pouring buckets o'rain outside, and you've gotten yourself into a prime cross-stitching situation. 

I didn't follow Chrissy's instructions exactly, because, what fun would that be?  To be honest, I really just messed up and counted wrong.  Apparently counting squares isn't as easy as I thought.  Oh well, it still turned out nicely, don't you think?

Cross-stitching outside on a lovely summer afternoon.
Yes, that's the pattern on my iPad with a delightful oak tree glare.

I also didn't use the suggested thread colors, as I wanted the finished project to hang in my guest room.  So, I took an extra piece of the wallpaper I have in that room to Michael's, (the store, not someone's house, in case you were confused.  It happens.) and matched my thread accordingly. 

Oh yeah, look at that progress.  Fancy.
Beautiful lap picture, no?

If you're lucky (and if I'm motivated enough to do another cross-stitch/want to blind myself), you may just find yourself on the receiving end of one of these hilariously inappropriate pieces for Christmas. Send me your wish list now...no promises.

Now...how to finish this project off?

Option 1: Make into a lovely bed pillow.

Option 2: Make a hole in this wallpaper (GASP!)
to hang the piece in a square frame on the wall.

Option 3: Finish and hang in a round frame here.

Thoughts?